The Beginning of the End

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Editorial

By editor on 16.3.2024

The Beginning of the End

The end of spring term is a relatively stressful time for the habitually lazy student. Pesky deadlines start to appear like new born chicks, those dreaded end of term exams aren’t far away, everyone starts to get a little strained by the work level. This stress feeds into other areas, just take a look at my dramatically disastrous love life, I’ve dated three girls since September, and am now currently bitter, twisted and alone, I blame the mountain of coursework.

Furthermore for the poor old final year students, real life starts looming like a menacing cloud on the horizon. The future it seems, is not so far way, we all know that distant realm that our parents occupy, often ominously referred to as ‘the real world’, with the dull as Grimsby on a wet Wednesday afternoon graduate job in marketing and the rubbish TV meals, soon that’ll be us. Brain dead, Saturday night spent with Chris Tarrant and a wailing baby, no thanks.

University for so long represented an escape, three years without serious employment, plus the added bonus of being able to behave in a permanently irresponsible manner, terrorising the student ghettos we inhabit, drinking ridiculous amounts of alcohol till the early hours, messing around with the opposite sex, or as may be your want, the same sex, in nightclubs, on street corners, in messy Parkwood bedrooms, all of this must come to an end, one day soon, sigh.

However, there is no need to despair, first of all, it’s not over yet, even if you’re a third year student, there are still three long months of hell raising to look forward too, plus think of all those wonderful summer exams, joy. On a more serious level, these last few months could be the last chance we get to share with now firmly entrenched friendship groups, before we graduate and take our lives on their own separate roads.

When University life does all come to its sad yet hopefully glorious conclusion, there should be nothing to worry about, there are many ways to avoid the soul crushing drudgery of nine to five work, simply enrol in a master’s course or take a year/life out, or, as I’m planning, just retire to a seaside brothel, gaining precious funds by scamming off the state and making semi serious investments in futures markets. Hopefully this wonderfully laid back student lifestyle will not end when we graduate, my fingers are crossed, University is simply the beginning, bring on the future.



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